1. The look on their face the first time they say "I love you" and the difficulty they have doing it.
2. The first time they kiss you in front of their friends.
3. When they say I love you" on the phone, and you know that their friends are in the room.
4. The look on their face when they realize that they are wrong and have to apologize.
5. The way they think that every woman should like sports, and their reactions when they find out we do.
6. The way they gently kiss the back of your neck.
7. They know the workings of every car but can't figure out how to unhook a bra.
8. The way they hold your face when they kiss your lips.
9. When they squeeze you tighly in the middle of a passionate kiss.
10. How they casually open doors for you without even thinking.
11. They can still make fun of you after you become more than "friends".
12. The look of awe on their face when they see you all dressed up for a date. (Awwwww it was so sweet)
13. The way they have a cassette tape planned out for the first date so that when they push it in the most romantic song is playing.
14. Their nervousness when they eat dinner with you and your parents for the first time. (Haha he was adorable when he met my mom...and then my little sisters...oh that was soooo cute!)
15. When they say "why don't we just stay in tonight and watch a movie".
16. How they blush at pictures of the two of you together.
17. How even when we are wearing sweaty spandex and a dirty shirt they still think we are beautiful.
18. The sheepish look on their face when we figure out that they have been wearing the same pair of jeans for the past 3 weeks.
19. How they try and play cool when another guy has been talking to you, and how they immediately know when another guy is looking at you.
20. Their reaction when they realize we can read them like a book.
21. How your shirt smells like their cologne after a date. (Awww, I did smell like him after the movies...)
22. How they rub your fingers when you are holding hands.
23. When you fall asleep to them scrathching your back and running their fingers through your hair.
24. When you wake up and realize that they have been watching you sleep.
25. How they always want things to be perfect for you. (yea its really cute)
26. The boyish look on their face when you come home and your parents ask what you did that night.
27. How they offer you their jacket on a cold night even though they only have on a T-shirt underneath.
28. How they let you beat them up even though they could destroy you with their pinkie.
29. How ticklish they can be.
30. How they complain when you borrow their shirts, but in fact they love seeing you in it.
31. That they refuse to drink beers out of a cup -- bottle, can, or no beer at all.
32. The way they are so confused about PMS, and hate hearing girls talk about "that time of the month".
33. When they realize that they said something stupid and spend the rest of the night trying to make up for it with compliments.
34. They want to hear the latest gossip as much as you, but they will never ask another guy.
35. he first time they acknowledge "your song".
36. When they unexpectedly visit you at work or home for no reason other than to say "hello". (Awww I remember when he used to do that...but now people notice it so he doesnt much anymore...)
37. How they think flowers will solve all problems - they usually do!
38. The first time they offer to wash your car.
39. How they can't remember what they wore yesterday, yet they remember what you did.
40. How your head fits perfectly into the crevices of their chest.
41. How their butts look so perfect in the oldest, most worn out jeans. (haha I wont comment on this one...you guys wouldn't liek it...)
42. Their curiosity when they enter your room for the first time.
43. How they let you ramble on and on without interrupting.
44. Talking to them while they shave.
45. Watching them from a distance and they don't know that you are there.
46. How they don't know what to say after you give them a gift.
47. The sound of their heart when you're cuddling, and how the two of your heartbeats fall into sync.
48. When they sing to you.
49. The look of utter amazement when they finally realize that we really do like them.
50. How they manage to piss us off, make us cry, and yet we still love them... (Yea...*sigh*)
51. The way they always wear their favorite cologne (which happens to be the one that you bought them for their birthday)
52. The way the run their hands through out hair
53. The way that they look at you and you want to die right then and there< (Awwwww)
54. The way that they casually put their arms around you
55. The way that they kiss away your tears
56. ...and the way that they then get mad at how they can't make your problem go away
57. The way they show off around their friends, even though you both know that you would love them even if they missed a basket or two
58. How their eyes light up at the result of 3 hours of preparing for your date (...or 5 hours of preparing for ball...)
59. How they always know just what to say to make you blush
60. How they sometimes think that they know just what to say to make you feel better, even if you think that it is the worst thing that they could say
61. The way they hold you close when you are cold
62. How they look at you when you're mad at them and all your anger melts away
63. How they always smile when you are together
64. The way that they always let you win any game that you play together
65. ... and then when you point that out to them they pretend to not know what you are talking about
66. The way that they smile at you (I LOVE HIS SMILE!)
67. The way that you feel when they call to apologize after you had a big fight
68. The way that they say I love you
69. The way that they say I love you in front of their friends
70. The way that they touch and hold you so gently, like they are afraid that they will break you
71. The way that they kiss you
72. The way that they open their arms to you when you are crying
73. The way that they never admit that you hurt them
74. The way that they try not to cry when they are afraid that they are losing you
75. The way that they think that they are your big protector, even though you think that you are theirs
76. The way that they say I miss you, even though they hate to admit it
77. The way that you miss everything about them when they are gone (*tear*)
78. The way that they remember your special moments, or aniversaries when you think that they forgot
79. The way that they apologize when they do forget
80. The way that they comfort you when you have a bad day
81. The way that you can't wait to get home and tell them all about your day
82. The way that they write you love letters even if they think that it is uncool
83. How they would rather be with you than their friends sometime
84. How you want to hug them even though they are all sweaty (Awwww)

Damn I'm pathetic...this is sad...it really is...Oh God, I'm so hooked...And I shouldn't let myself be...I know he's leaving and yet I can't hold back my feelings...

This is driving me insane! My mother knows far too much for my good. I don't want her being able to read my mind. I mean, God only knows what else she might know. There's a reason I don't tell her ANYTHING anymore! Ugh! I certainly didn't want her to know I was really upset he's moving. Damnit, she was supposed to think he was just a friend. She wasn't supposed to know I really liked him, or that he liked me. My family wasn't supposed to love him! They were supposed to give me a reason not to like him, another reason for nothign to come of this. But no, everything is perfect except for the fact that he's fucking moving to BOSTON by the end of the month! Damnit I wish I had applied to Boston now. I want to go there so bad. But since I can't go with him, I want him to have some reason, anything at all to stay here. I can't believe how everything has fallen into place except for him moving. It would all be so perfect. And yet he has to go. I hate lying to him, it just kills me. It literally breaks my heart to have to lie to him, and yet I can't tell him I'm upset that he's going. It's a big move for him, and he's following his dreams. I can't hold him back. But God I want to. And it kills me to let him go. I'm absolutely dying inside right now knowing that he's leaving in a month, letting him go, lying to him, pretending to be os excited. Well I guess I'm not pretending, I really am excited for him, I am. I am thrilled that he has the guts to follow his dreams and stick it out no matter what anyone tells him. I'm absolutely thrilled that he has this opportunity, that people want him to wrestle and be on TV. But God, why couldn't it be somewhere closer? Why? Damnit now I'm starting to cry again. I hate this whole thing. I like this guy so much and it hurts so bad to see him go. God I can't do this anymore...

i just want to see if this actually works